Lindisfarne

Oh Kendra~


I got a call from the British hospital late last night about Sophie. She had gone on “pilgrimage” to Lindisfarne—which she’d never told me about— I had no idea that her dream to walk to the Holy Island ‘through the waters’ to her sacred site meant crossing dangerous undertows of incredibly fast tides. I had no idea she planned to walk at night, by herself through the waters—it was a New Moon last night, and it must have been very dark. I still don’t know if she knew how many “pilgrims” had died this way; people like her, who didn’t swim, and got caught in the undertow.

Was she risking all for God? Was she depressed? Manic? Suicidal or---“enraptured”?



I’m leaving tomorrow….they said she had a concussion and was barely conscious by the time someone found her and pulled her out of the water—she had lashed herself by her belt to a pole that wasn’t that far from the island.



I feel so ashamed. I never told you that my daughter, Sophie is a Christian fundamentalist; the ‘only daughter of an astrologer’—ah... I feel Sophie must feel ashamed of me. Why do these beliefs come between us? Why did she go there? Was she hoping to become more…..faithful?



Will write more when I find out what’s happened….I’m off to England, to Lindisfarne, to the nearest little hospital in “Berwick-on-Tweed”. I wonder if they contacted her father, Alistair too—I can’t imagine seeing him again after five years….and meeting him this way.

!!!~ Isabelle

Dear Kendra, Sept 5th

Dear Kendra~

I just found this poem I wrote for Alistair and I, years before our separation, and it made me cry. I wrote it after we returned from a trip to France, and I believe there was a wonderful Neptune/Venus aspect happening at the time.



Neptune rules nostalgia, film and photographs, yearning, illusions, and combined with Venus it nurtures romantic idealism at its best. I remember thinking Alistair and I would be together always…such a sense of severance I feel now…



I called the Poem “Old Photographs” as I was imagining us looking together at photographs in years to come—and now it has been over two years that we’ve been apart. I don’t know how we will ever come around to finalizing the separation into a divorce; I certainly can’t do it. It all makes me sad. This must be part of Saturn conjuncting my Sun in the 7th house of marriage. Since Saturn takes over 2 years to travel through each section of the chart, each house, I wonder how it will play out for us? I suppose Saturn here is also capable of re-uniting us, but I haven’t seen signs of it…



Old Photographs

"I was in the café, sitting in front of the potted geraniums

wearing the straw hat I just bought.

I was writing a postcard to my mother

when I looked up to see the shadows

of the early autumn evening

dancing on the stucco walls.



Then you walked by—you were taking pictures of the light.

I watched you… trying to imagine what you were seeing there.

And then you turned your gaze on me

and shot this one here—

a little out of focus—but it was then that I saw them—

the tenderest eyes I’d ever seen.



Look. This is where we found ourselves standing later

by the edge of the river—the one Van Gogh painted.

We walked for hours feeling Van Gogh.

You talked apertures, lens and focus.



This was the hotel, Le D’Arlatan…

Do you remember wandering the back streets—

lost in the cobbled labyrinths—

till we found ourselves here?



The oversized antique bed held expectations. I felt shy.

You said—“Pull the curtains,” and I pulled the heavy curtains back.

I read you a poem by candlelight.

You smiled right into my soul—then served us farmer’s wine

in the opalescent glasses we’d bought that day.



I put the photographs down.

“It was so good,” you say.

“Like the wisp of a dream I can barely remember.”

I lean into your eyes; those milky apertures

transparent with the film of a lifetime.



Now, I offer you wine and pull the curtains open

catching the last dance of light on the peach colored walls.

You put on the old songs…

We sit in chairs by the window,

admiring the blue hydrangeas

our knees will touch, and we will speak about how

the quality of light makes everything different

and everything the same." ~



With love,

Isabelle

Private Journal, August 26

Private Journal, August 26, 2010


It was only in 1920, on this day, that women got the right to vote in the United States! Ah~ how those women struggled “to have a voice” and how we still struggle to find our true voice, our authentic Self and express it…every one of us.



This language of astrology has become a voice for me. But it’s strange how ambivalent I feel about it! I hate cocktail-talk astrology, and just don’t do it. And when I called Kendra after the last letter about her miscarriage, I certainly didn’t want to “talk astrology” but the language of the heart.



But there’s more to my reluctance. When I told her that I feel like a “reluctant astrologer” she asked me what I meant--and I couldn’t find the words! So now as I sit here writing in this journal I’m going to try to “think it out” and find my voice that is so often reluctant and ambivalent about astrology….

First there’s the good: this language has given me a voice so that I can speak and counsel others without pathologizing, blaming or shaming. It’s short term therapy—and all therapies—seem to me to me to be the same at the core. Different techniques, yes, and some better at different times, but doesn’t it all come down to: LOVE heals & INSIGHT heals. That’s the heart of it: understanding, catharsis/crying, and love. Love heals.



When astrology “normalizes” experience, as in “yes, that’s one of the ways that a Saturn Return will play out in your life” there’s comfort there, as one can feel connected to a larger sense of meaning and patterns—even a God—something that is not all about random chaos, and luck or the lack of it—or will power and the lack of it.



And when an astrologer listens well—there can be a sense of loving connection between them as well as this connection to a larger pattern of things—even if it’s only to sacred wounds we all carry.



There are times when astrology is “eerily” on target—when what I say and the details of the story of their life synchronize strangely. How could I know those things if astrology wasn’t at least partially true? How could I know that the key to a Pluto transit is about letting go and surrender, whereas the key to a Jupiter transit is “be careful what you wish for, as you may get it?” Hmm… Jupiter transits sound like a coaching session---“do you know what you really want?” whereas a Neptune focused session might be more like: “No, you’re not losing your mind or getting Alzheimer’s, but you just need to let it be OK to “not know” right now…and don’t sign on the dotted line either till this transit passes…!”



So….what’s the problem then….with astrology? With me? Bottom line: there is no way I or anyone else can say how a particular sign or aspect or transit will be played out. Too much variation; no tight foretelling or “signatures” for events. So when a planet, like Saturn, crosses the 4th house cusp, I can say to a person-- you’re going to start thinking about moving, or at the least, about radical re-modeling your home—because you’re wanting your inner sense of home and your outer physical home to be aligned, and there’s a change coming. But I have no idea if this will be played with joy or despair or just how the person will "rework" this foundation area of their chart...their home.



I wonder if it doesn’t all come down to the fact that we have free will and we’re separate Souls making choices? And so astrology is more like a weather forecast than a fortune teller’s prediction. I think if a fortune teller or psychic is right, it’s more likely that a person is in their default habitual pattern of doing things, and not aware of all their possibilities. I guess that’s what astrology should do….make us aware of these opportunities and challenges so that we make the best choices.



But still…I remain reluctant. What happens when we see multiple aspects that are challenging all at the same time? Like what I am facing in the next few years…I wonder if it plants a seed of anxiety? But maybe that’s not bad? I get to sense my mortality, so my decisions might be better. The Buddhists seem to think that meditating upon impermanence is a good idea. I’m not sure….think I'll go up to the art studio and get out of my head for awhile and into my paints....

Letter #9: Astro-Jargon and the Language of the Heart

Dear Kendra~


Last night I was sitting at dinner between two astrologers who were talking voraciously about their techniques--the rightness of the Placidus or Koch house systems, their views on declinations, mid-points, and orbs, and the disparity between Vedic and Western astrology. I found myself in a strangely quiet mood. They seemed like two jewelers exclaiming the beauty of their gems, the profundity of their skills—and their suspicious interplay left me hungry. I listened to their astro-jargon, thinking all the while that they were like bees gathering no nectar. By the time we got to the dessert, I finally found space in the conversation—and was aggravated enough to offer a different opinion.



"What about going deeper into the richness of this mythological language— what about the art of translating astro-jargon into soulful English--! What about bringing it into useful, practical insights drawn from simple techniques?" I challenged them--asking them what they would say to seeing Neptune squaring Mars in a chart and explaining that to a client. I wondered if they knew the simple “rule of three” where one looks to see if a psychological pattern is repeated three times in order to gage its importance. And finally I asked them if they knew that the Nodes have a way of pulling the whole chart together—they didn’t know that.



Perhaps I was not in a good mood for "parroting about" with the astro-jargon because I was thinking about your heartfelt letter. How could I reply to that? There wasn’t going to be any simple astrological insight that would make it better—only perhaps the knowing that I was hearing and feeling you..call it .love, friendship, caring...whatever.... and I was loving  the reflection you gave about the Moon and Pluto, and how the resonance between what happened and the astrological symbolism made you feel that you were part of a larger whole--you have been through a sacred wounding known to many women. It was a wise letter.



So now, instead of talking Saturn Returns and astrological aspects, I’d rather share with you these feelings that came up as I was having my morning coffee—this is what I wrote in my journal:



“When someone deeply listens to you, the fist-muscle of the heart relaxes and opens, in sweet surprise. When someone deeply listens to you, you begin to breathe. The heart extends itself like a child’s up-reaching hand and is held. It’s as if a cup that was half-empty now fills with waters of unexpected grace, and the touch of their eyes on your Soul opens the floodgates to healing tears. When someone holds you in their heart, listening deeply with words both said and unsaid, the heart rejoices… and you come to know yourself for the first time as worthy, whole and holy. In this sacred moment of time, there is love.”

I hope I have listened to you this way. I hold you in my heart….and this is what I send to you this morning, Kendra~

Isabelle

Private Papers of a Reluctant Astrologer: Fifth Letter

Dear Isabelle~


I was reading your book last night about the North and South Nodes, and when I read what you wrote in it about my Nodes, my boyfriend, Carl, said it was all “magical thinking.” Well, you know what? I don’t care, because what you wrote about the Nodes, destiny, fate, and especially my North Node in Leo really touched something deep inside me and it felt right…very right. I also haven’t told you something. Not just about the fortune-tellers prediction…


OK—this is what happened: I was re-reading about my Nodes—my life direction and soul purpose as you say—and it was so synchronistic that you used Joni Mitchell as an example of this North Node Leo pattern! You said it was “time to come in from the cold.” Did you know that’s a line from one of her songs? And—I was listening to that song at the exact moment of reading your words about North Node Leo to Carl --talk about synchronicity!


You said: “ The soul purpose here is to create loving connections with others in order to heal a sense of being the outsider or the persecuted one. By leaving behind harsh judgments of myself or others, the idea now in this life is to ‘come in from the cold’ and become one of us. Your need is to open your heart, and make your presence felt—dare to shine and step forward…be effective and compelling rather than being concerned about being right.”


Then you said that the “shadow with these Nodes is an entrenched fear that entices one to be controlling, inflexible or stubborn…but that having a sense of humor shows that one knows or can contain the pain of life, and can accept the drama of it all as well.”


OK, well here it is. I’m pregnant. And that astrologer was predicting that my relationship was going to break up when transiting Saturn reached my “Seventh House” next winter—and he was also saying that unless I change something in me, I’ll never have a relationship! And then he started saying Scorpio Sun and Leo North Node was too controlling, that we’re drama queens, and yet I feel like an exile, not a queen! I feel “out of the circle” as it is, different and alienated, and that’s my fear…that I don’t know how to love and be loved. That’s the South Node Aquarius that I coming from and can’t seem to leave behind.


Well, as I was reading this to Carl he just acted bored and like I was out of my mind, and I got really angry at him. I told him if he didn’t care for me and how I feel inside, then what were we about? I tried to point to his Nodes in your book, but he didn’t even want to look at his own patterns.


It got worse—I showed him the letter between us about my Moon in Cancer and we came to talking about children, and he said he didn’t want children. Period. And I said, guess what? I’m pregnant! Yes, it’s true. I cried, and apologized, and said it was all a big mistake, and he said—get an abortion. Nothing about how it was his “mistake” too. Nothing about feelings or possibilities. Then my rage turned black, and I said yes I would—I’d get an abortion right now! I’m aborting you right now! I screamed. And I threw him out the door.


OK, some drama, I know. But with my back against the door, I started crying and then the tears stopped, and I felt and a certain coolness came over me. I’m angry at my own stupidity for choosing such a cold man, and that it had to come to this. Maybe I do need to dare (with my Aries rising) and to be open-hearted (Leo) and to stop holding it all inside and being secretive (my planets in Scorpio.) You once told me that “the exiled heretic must take a stand and make a Presence in the world”—do something big—well I made a big mistake with him. And now I have to decide what I really will do.


So this is the Saturn Return. So tell me what you think, and send me a copy of your chart too, if you don’t mind. Somehow studying astrology and spirituality while I’m dealing with all this feels like the only good thing happening right now.
Sadly,
Kendra

The Private Papers of a Reluctant Astrologer: Fourth Letter (not sent)/ Private Journal

The Private Papers of a Reluctant Astrologer: Fourth Letter (not sent)/ Private Journal: "Dear Kendra~ I'm writing this in my journal first because I'm trying to think how to talk to you about your chart before I write yo..."

The Private Papers of A Reluctant Astrologer

To Readers of North Node Astrology~
I've started a new astrological "book in a blog" set up as letters between an older astrologer, Isabelle, who is mentoring a younger women, Kendra. Isabelle has taken on Kendra as a student and she will be privately teaching her through these letters. We'll also see Isabelle's private journal and personal struggles around her own issues of fate and destiny. Both women are experiencing their Saturn Returns, one at 29 years old, and one at 59 years old.


Their email/letter correspondence has deep meaning and synchronicity for both of them--and what is the prediction that seems to be coming true? Why does Isabelle call herself a "reluctant astrologer"? Oscar Wilde said: "The final mystery is oneself" but these women want to delve deeper into understanding their unconscious motivations and karma through astrology--as well as deciphering what is really happening in these years of
"2012" which have already begun.


If you sign in/subscribe as a reader you will be sent an automatic email as each new chapter is written. Hope to see some of you there! Leave your comments and questions as well.....the direct link is on the sidebar here, or you can cut and paste this: http://PrivatePapersof-a-ReluctantAstrologer.blogspot.com

Mark Twain's Astrological Chart: Haley's Comet

Haley's comet passed across the November skies in 1835, the same month Mark Twain was born--and it was his greatest wish--and proclaimed vow--that he would "go out" with the passing of that comet some 75 years later. And he did. Twain died on April 21, 1910 as Haley passed across the heavens once again. Twain had another wish too--that his autobiography would come out exactly 100 years after his death--as per his instructions--on this November 2010. And so Twain, like Carl Jung and the publication of Jung's Red Book, will be in the news again and we'll be able to read the inner thoughts of another man of integrity.

After watching Ken Burn's poignant documentary on the life of Mark Twain, I was astounded at the depth of Twain's character. Here was an author, satirist, humorist, and great humanitarian who suffered such tragedy in his life--a massive bankruptcy, public shame, and the early death of his daughter--and yet who vowed not only to pay back every penny of his his debt in bankruptcy by doing ten years of grueling hard work, but who also had the audacity to tell "the gods" that his greatest wish was to die with the passing of Haley's comet, and "the gods" obliged.

I don't intend to tell his story here, but just to point out some points of astrologiucal significance. Born with his Sun in Sagittarius, he had the natural story telling ability, ego strength and optimism that is characteristic of that sign. His Moon, in Aries, reflects his emotional courage, passionate and entrepenurial character. Yet that Moon was conjunct Pluto, God of the Underworld, and Twain suffered not only personal deaths and rebirths, but the early deaths of those closest to him. He expressed the suffering of slavery, of humanity's cruelty to each other, and he dared to rage against "God himself." And yet he did it as one of us--not with a finger of blame, but instead by "smiling through the sorrow" with his characteristic good will towards all.

How did he do it? With grit and force of character--astrologers see this in his chart with Scorpio rising as well as his South Node in Scorpio in the first house--and his great summons to his live into his North Node in Taurus in the Seventh house of marriage, and intimate one on one relationships---all of which grounded him in a reality that allowed him to endure and be creative. In the polarity between these Nodes we see the balance and challenge of the Scorpio and Taurus Nodes--the tension between the Scorpionic drama of life with its capacity to overwhelm and the Taurus rootedness in loyalty, steadfastness, and the good things of this earth.

Of course, he overdid it all--as a a Sag with an Aries Moon might do, but he lived to tell about it, and now with Ken Burn's documentary and his upcoming autobiography, we get to see the story of death and rebirth profoundly expressed in the life of a man with so much integrity that even "God himself" honored him with his last wish. (c) Elizabeth Spring http://www.elizabethspring.com/

"Purpose is the Place Where Your Deep Gladness Meets the World's Needs"

“Purpose is the place where your deep gladness meets the world’s needs.”
Frederick Buechner

Writing “North Node Astrology”, a book about how to find one’s life direction and soul purpose, sounds a little arrogant or naïve depending on whether or not you believe astrology has anything truly worthwhile to say at all. One’s life direction seems to evolve through some mysterious equation of fate, character and destiny. How far does our free will take us? How random is fate? Metaphysical questions abound, yet it is in the making of character through the depth of our insight that intrigues me. My hope is that this book gives you, dear reader, a rather “special and curious tool” to dig deeper into the whys and wherefores of character and destiny. And as for soul purpose, I share a common yet sacred bias here, in saying that it is ultimately bound up with our growing ability to love and be loved.

Similarly, as a counselor I’m inclined to say that one’s life direction and soul purpose is about the movement towards healing and wholeness—for who among us is not wounded and less than whole? Our life direction sometimes seems to evolve as much by default as it does by purpose, and yet we sense that it’s more than the “visible hat” we wear in the world. It is about our healing, wholeness and deep happiness, and this is different for each of us.

Can you remember when you first heard the words of the poet, William Wordsworth, when he said “our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting, the Soul that rises with us, our life’s Star, hath had elsewhere its setting, and cometh from afar: not in entire forgetfulness, and not in utter nakedness, but trailing clouds of glory…”? Maybe it’s true that life existed before this birth, perhaps not. However, embracing the theory of reincarnation is not necessary to get something out of this book—what I might see as the reincarnational story, you the reader, might understand as the effect of early childhood experiences and parental DNA. Either theory works.

As you might rightly assume, my point of view is that I like the theory of reincarnation, because although not provable, it’s a way to look at the world that holds the promise of fairness and justice. It’s a hopeful bias—because we all know that life is often not “fair” to a person in one life, but it may prove to be somehow mysteriously “fair” over many lifetimes. The law of cause and effect, of karma, operates silently with its twin sisters, fate and destiny, in ways we don’t fully understand from our perspective. Yet we may be able to discern an order and an invisible pattern when you look closely—such as when you look at the backside of a tapestry or when you see the “lay of the land” from the top of the mountain. The closer I look and the farther I look, the more interesting the patterns become.

What are these invisible patterns we might not see? A friend once said, “Be kinder than necessary because everyone we meet is fighting some kind of battle.” What is that invisible battle we don’t see in our friend? What are the invisible patterns in our life? What happens when we detect patterns using theories such as astrology and reincarnation? Perhaps they must simply be felt and experienced rather than proven, and then decided whether they are useful or not. It is in these realms I seek to probe.

So I accept reincarnation and astrology as a “kind theory” that challenges chaos and randomness. It gives me faith that there is “meaningfulness” to existence even if it can’t be proven or discerned in one life. Looking at things this way, life feels too cruel—yet we all go to the movies to watch a good story. We accept the drama and tragedy in a story.

In the Eastern tradition of Vedantic Hinduism we were once all part of the One story that created this great pattern. Their theory of reincarnation postulates that we live through lifetime after lifetime of lila and maya, of play and illusion, till we arrive back at the place where we started at the beginning. According to this philosophy there is an evolutionary story evolving—that there are synchronistic correlations and resonances between things, and that an evolutionary drama is being enacted. Like the legendary “magus” Hermes Trigmegestus once said: “As it is above, so it is below, as it is in the inner, so it is in the outer.” Man is the microcosm, the universe the macrocosm, and in some metaphysical sense they are One. I like to entertain these possibilities as being true.

So if you can suspend your skepticism about reincarnation and entertain the idea that astrological symbolism is a language best used to explore psychological and spiritual terrains—well then, I invite you to consider that there may be something in your birth chart that speaks of your specific life direction and soul purpose.

If you approach this book with an open and curious mind, you come to the question—why do I have this particular astrological chart? Why was I born at this particular time and place? Did I come here to learn or experience something unique to me? This kind of thinking challenges you to question everything you think you know about yourself and to look beneath the obvious.

And for those of you who have already seen the value of astrology in describing who you are and what you’re experiencing, then you’re ready to begin excavating the “soul’s code” embedded in the ancient astrological points of the North and South Node—known in India as Rahu and Ketu. These nodes aren’t planets, but astronomical points that have been overlooked in the recent past by astrologers preoccupied with prediction, rather than purpose. I believe they are true astrological gold. Astrological gold? Yes, like the alchemist’s philosopher’s stone, these esoteric points in the birth chart give us a base to turn the Saturnian “lead” of mundane reality into philosophic gold. An astrologer might say they offer a mercurial secret knowledge.

This process of looking to an oracle—or more accurately, looking for an oracular sign for direction, is like asking to make what is unconscious, conscious. It’s like unraveling a good mystery novel, and lends us a small but useful measure of control over our life. As Carl Jung once said, “When an inner situation is not made conscious, it happens outside as fate.” How exciting it is to ponder the idea that we might have some say in our fate! Is it an interesting theory, or a gift of grace from the gods? You decide.
© Elizabeth Spring

***

Pandora's Box

The mythical Pandora and the Biblical Eve both had a curiosity to know the truth, and were willing to go outside limits and look inside hidden and forbidden places to find deeper truths. Do you know what was in the bottom of Pandora's box? It was hope.

Their curiosity was a symbol of the human search for wisdom and consciousness. They chose to know what was real and true rather than to live a childlike fantasy. Because they sought to know what was beyond the obvious, they began the journey of consciousness, knowledge and wisdom.

I find the stories of Pandora and Eve to be poignant and courageous. The struggle to achieve consciousness is tied to duality--there is suffering in the journey as well as freedom from ignorance. I respect the fact that Pandora, like Eve, was told not to disobey orders from the gods--and that they chose consciousness over naivete. I like that "Hope" was there in the bottom of Pandora's box. ~

I'm working now to balance time between writing and do readings/counseling again, and I apologize for not being able to personally answer questions from readers. I hope that my book, "North Node Astrology: Rediscovering Your Life Direction and Soul Purpose" available only on www.amazon.com will answer some of those questions for readers interested in the Nodes and the life transitions that they are experiencing now. I believe their is much hope and wisdom in our personal and collective journeys. I am an eternal optimist, and for those of you who would like to have a phone session, the details are on the homepage of www.elizabethspring.com

And why the thoughts on Pandora? Simply because our journey is filled with all manner of dualities and it's the symbolism under the literal interpretation of our lives that is so important to look at--what's the lesson here? What's the truth? And...isn't it sometimes quite beautiful, just like Waterhouse's painting of Pandora? I think it is....

The Reluctant Astrologer, Part 2

"Once upon a time there was a woman, who wasn’t as young as she used to be, who sat at her table to write. It was very early morning, and she had just awoken from a night full of terrible dreams. In every dream she was lost and no one could hear or help her. After each dream she awoke, and thought it was over. But it wasn't: there was yet another bad dream, and then another.


She wasn’t totally unprepared for this to happen, for she was a wise woman and had seen signs of it coming. The flood last week, with the waters rising in the basement, had permeated her psyche like the mold that was beginning to grow, and the soggy destruction of her old books and keepsakes was not a good sign. She found she could no longer hold back the slow undertow of tears that she had forced back in her waking life. Kendra had indeed “entered a dark wood” and although the sun was out and all appeared well, she knew she had lost her way.


As Kendra sat at her table to write, she stared at the page and didn’t know where to begin. She, who taught and counseled others, now knew she was the one needing guidance. She knew what she knew, for she was wise in some ways, but she also knew that she couldn’t carry the burden of the rising waters alone.


As she began to write she thought about how she had spoken to others about the importance of containing water—the emotions—within the metaphorical banks of the river. But when the storm rains come to her house, and the Neptunian waters inundated everything Kendra and her husband had spoken sharp words to each other on how to solve this basement “dankness’—their words were filled with exasperation and frustration—and before they knew what had happened, they had wounded each other and felt more alone than before. It seemed as if the dankness of the water had invaded their psyches. And so separately they took turns slogging their tired hearts around the wet basement, trying to rescue what was salvageable.


But this wasn’t the whole story. The words were slow to come on this particular morning although she knew that feeling lost was often the beginning of any journey. New beginnings were often heralded by a Pluto-phoenix experience: destruction came before reconstruction, and Pluto signifies a metaphorical death and rebirth. She wanted that new beginning, and an ending of something, though she wasn’t clear about what that would look like. She did know however, that it was time to discern more clearly what it was in her life she needed to keep, and what she needed to release. She loved her husband, and despite their differences, she hoped with all her heart that the cracks in the relationship were simply the natural cracks of the tension of a long marriage.


But something else was gnawing at her as well. Something was summoning her to change. It was a yearning in her Soul and “a knowing" that she was being moved by the Universe outside of her own Will. Others had come to her with this same problem: some had spoken of feeling stuck, or of being torn between opposing desires, and some had the feeling that an unwelcome change was coming. They all needed reassurance that eventually all would be well. And Kendra believed this to be true: all things pass.


Kendra paused, sighed, and stared out the window at the naivete of the spring morning. She thought how each new day and each new birth feels fateful. It’s as if the lover or God or Muse is “doing unto me” something that will change my life forever. Will it be allowed space to enter? Will it find expression? Or will I resist?


She picked up her pen again and wrote: 'A wise woman takes care of herself, and yet seeks help from another. She asks for help but most of all, she asks her Self: What do I do now? And then she takes the time to listen. Kendra remembered being pregnant and how she had a way of waiting and attending to herself, going slowly and patiently. She endured being sick and feeling not quite right, because there was new life stirring within. There was fear and there was hope. As she grew larger each month, she learned to trust the process of change, and the sick feeling of being lost or being taken over by something else began to pass. In time the birth came, and all was well.'" Kendra hoped it would be the same now, but was not so naive that she didn't know the dangers. She put down her pen and walked outside. The air smelled fresh and good and clean. ~ Elizabeth Spring
www.elizabethspring.com

What Breaks the Heart? What Gladdens the Heart? What Happens When You Mix the Passion of the Poet, Rumi, wtih the Alchemy of Carl Jung?

The book: “North Node Astrology” starts out with the quote:

“Purpose is the place where your deep gladness meets the world’s needs.” Frederick Buechner spoke those words years ago, which I now juxtapose with a quote by author/mystic, Andrew Harvey: “Be thankful that you live in a time so terrible, it will lead you to your authentic Self.”



The holding of this kind of terrible opposition is the “tension of opposites” that Carl Jung spoke about when he spoke of God, or the “transcendent function.” He once said that God is beyond ideas of good and evil, and is more than the “coincidentia oppositorum”—he felt that it was in the holding of such oppositions as great despair and great hope that we create the spaciousness for the alchemy of our transformation. In the holding of the opposites, we make room for God or the transcendent function in the Soul, the psyche.



It is here in the holding of such opposites, such as where your heart breaks and where your heart finds joy—here is where “the numinous third” can arise – the midpoint between the two opposing positions. Jung tended to counsel “waiting” and a patient holding of the opposites in the crucible of our psyche. When we hold our love and pain together, what can arise is a gift of grace: the point which is the center of the mandala. This is what Jung saw as the third unseen possibility/option which is unfelt at first. Like a gift of grace, it arises of its own accord.



And yet does this create a“passivity” within us? I suspect it could, except in these days when our culture leans towards acting out. Perhaps the “third” that arises is a summons towards compassionate action. We hear that expressed in the Sufi poet, Rumi—as Andrew Harvey expresses it so well: “Rumi is a lion of passion trying to teach a humanity of depressed sheep how to roar…to roar with divine love.” Rumi would have us crawl out from under the dirty blanket of denial to ignite the passion—a passion that has the intensity to birth something truly new.


So isn’t Rumi really asking us to rise to another level of intensity—of radical commitment to ourselves and to our values? Reading his poetry he begs and cajoles us to act on our beliefs and loves—but eventually the only respite that came to him from his painful yearning for his beloved, was to become the Beloved. He held the tension of the opposites within himself, until like Jung believed, the opposites yielded a third: he eventually found within himself the union of opposites. ~ Elizabeth Spring http://www.elizabethspring.com/