Research on Node Reversal in Synastry

This is a guest post by Neith

Whenever I wish to do some astrological research I have my family birth data to draw upon going back a couple of generations. In this instance, I was curious to see what the patterns were within the family for Reversed Moon’s Nodes for couples and their children. My personal experience of relating to another person who has the opposite Nodes suggests proximity is an important factor. I have several cyber-friends with North Node in Sagittarius very close to my South Node in Sagittarius and there are no problems at all. It seems to take the day-to-day interchanges to up the irritation factor – like working with someone or living with them in a family setting.

What I found after looking up all my extended family’s birth dates was very interesting. Out of all the couples in both my parent’s generation and mine, only ONE had Reversed Nodes! In fact, only a few parent/children had Reversed Nodes and most of the time it was the mother, not the father, involved. These were children that left home at the first opportunity, usually going off to school halfway across the country.

It is my aunt and uncle who live closest to us who have the Reversed Nodes. They will have been married for 55 years this year and it has been a stressful relationship most of that time. My uncle is 10 yrs older than my aunt (my mother’s youngest sister) and they have 5 children, the oldest of whom is 9 years younger than I. I don’t have birth times for either person so I will just review the astrology using the shorthand method.

My aunt is an Aquarius Sun, Capricorn Moon and my uncle has a Taurus Sun and very likely an Aquarius Moon. If this is the case, the Luminaries form a trine and conjunction by sign – very compatible! Their Moons would be semi-sextile (Capricorn to Aquarius) and that does seem to fit. My aunt is extremely well organized and always had neatly written lists of chores for her kids posted about. =grin=

Their Mercury’s are trine too. Her Mercury is in Capricorn and his in Taurus and they are both practical sorts and can take care of business when they need to.

His Mars is in Libra trine her Venus in Aquarius and her Mars in Capricorn is trine his Venus in Taurus. However, with their Mars square by sign, they have a difficult time agreeing on how to work together. And their Venuses are square giving them very different ideas of enjoyment. Once their children were grown they quite attempting to vacation together at all and my uncle would go hunting with my dad (they have been friends since childhood) and my aunt would fly off to Europe by herself.

Saturn plays a role here too with Saturn/Venus intra-aspects, always a good indicator of durability. Plus his Mercury/Venus conjunction in Taurus are exactly conjunct her Chiron/North Node in Taurus. He has his Sun conjunct his South Node in Taurus and is quite comfortable living in home he was born in and grew up in . . .

I believe it is the combination of very compatible elements, the Saturn/Venus intra-aspect and the tidy synastry stellium in Taurus, noted for staying with the known quantity, which has contributed to them staying together. They are both Fixed sign types too and the Nodal axis here is Taurus/Scorpio, noted for tenacity. But I know first hand how bitter things are and how unhappy they have been for much of their married life. Based on my own experiences and this example, I have to say if I saw Reversed Nodes in a couple’s synastry, I would caution them to really consider carefully what type of relationship they wish to have.

A snip of this post appears on Neith on Synastry.

Leo Full Moon Joy

Moon

The moon is full tonight
an illustration for sheet music,
an image in Matthew Arnold
glimmering on the English Channel,
or a ghost over a smoldering battlefield
in one of the history plays.

It's as full as it was
in that poem by Coleridge where
he carries his year-old son into the orchard
behind the cottage and turns the baby's face
to the sky to see for the first time
the earth's bright companion,
something amazing to make his crying seem small.

And if you wanted to follow this example,
tonight would be the night
to carry some tiny creature outside
and introduce him to the moon.
And if your house has no child,
you can always gather into your arms
the sleeping infant of yourself,
as I have done tonight,
and carry him outdoors,
all limp in his tattered blanket,
making sure to steady his lolling
headwith the palm of your hand.
And while the wind ruffles the pear trees
in the corner of the orchard and dark roses
wave against a stone wall, you can turn him
on your shoulder and walk in circles on the lawn
drunk with the light.
You can lift him up into the sky,
your eyes nearly as wide as his,
as the moon climbs high into the night.

~ Billy Collins ~

Libra North Node; Aries South Node

North Node Libra

Serenity is your goal in this lifetime, and you need to calm down, release tension, and allow all forms of beauty and harmony to heal you. Like a finely turned violin, you need to catch stress and pressure before it causes something to snap. There may have been something exhausting earlier in this life or in a previous life experience where you placed great emphasis on personal l achievement, self-sacrifice and courageous action. Now its time to release the singular survival urge and the "me vs you" mentality and develop your Soul's yearning for co-operative relationships. Create win/win situations with others rather than engaging in victim-rescuer scenarios. Leaning about right relationship is one of the main tasks for you in this life, and it will require a relaxing of some old ways of thinking and being.

As your understanding of human nature grows, you acquire a tolerance for paradox and ambiguity and for the many different ways people perceive reality. As this increasing acceptance of the complexities of life and people grow you may find yourself in positions of peace-keeping or as a counselor or mediator. You are also good in the Venusian fields of art, entertaining, and beauty. With your new focus on inter-dependence rather than dependence or on independence, you've finally found a way to assert yourself with confidence, and without creating conflict. Your new objectivity and ability to see all sides of an issue can bring a deep contentment into your life and into the lives of anyone you touch. Allowing yourself to be receptive and not rushed into making decisions is good for you.

As you move to redeem the gold in the shadow of Aries, you may find that you're drawn to be a crusader for a cause you believe in, or as champion for an underdog. On your life path you may have had to become less self-centered to find the serenity and co-operation with others you've so desired, but now you may need to regain some of the Aries assertiveness again. Libra is about balance, but without a good dose of the Martian courageousness and sense of adventure, Libra can be ineffective and indecisive. Regain your balance by daring to do what you thought you couldn't do!

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Additional Thoughts on the North Node in Libra by Neith

When I think of the North Node in Libra, I remember my mother. She had her Sun in Libra conjunct the North Node and in addition to those placements, she had Jupiter conjunct Saturn is Libra. Yes, learning Libra’s lessons of co-operation were very much part of her life experiences. As the child whose Libra Moon/Neptune conjunction was conjunct my mother’s Sun/North Node, I was very aware of the nuances in the family especially when it came to my mother. It was obvious she placed my father on the top of her list of important people, before her children to be honest. Being a Libra myself, this didn’t particularly bother me but I can see where it did my siblings. My mother made sure we did many things as a family because that was what my Cancer dad wanted. In fact, we sat down and ate our meals together as a family until we grew up and left home.

My parents were married for almost 63 years at the time of her death. This type of commitment to being married is very consistent with both the North Node in Libra and having Saturn in Libra. Both those positions have a deep understanding of what it means to be truly a part of a one-on-one relationship requiring compromise and co-operation to succeed. My mother also had Chiron in Aries, widely conjunct the South Node in Aries and it seems to me she was the most off balance when she acted completely on her own, Aries fashion. During the last few years of her life, it did appear she was drawing more on her South Node than I ever remember her doing before, largely to ease her passing to make it less difficult for her husband – successfully I might add.

In retrospect I can see the years my mother went deer and elk hunting with my father, grandfather and uncle as an expression of her South Node in Aries Martian courageousness and sense of adventure! I certainly didn’t follow in her footsteps there nor did I follow her example of marrying young and devoting my life to a spouse and family. We did share a deep appreciation for beauty and harmony though and through her South Node in Aries, she did understand my subtle fierceness of having Mars/Mercury/Ascendant in Scorpio. I loved my mother very, very much . . .

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~Elizabeth Spring http://www.elizabethspring.com/ Artwork by Kerstin Zettmar at Kerstin@zettmar.com

As you see, all North Node descriptions are similar to sun sign descriptions, without the South Node opposition. Any North Node Libras out there with more to add? As a Sun sign Libra I find I'm only indecisive on the big issues of life, and the little decisions are quickly done.....

Sagittarius North Node, Gemini South Node

Sagittarius North Node



Having come into this life with the talent for seeing so many different points of view, it's important now for you to continually hone in on your own "Truth" and find the philosophic rudder for your life. It's good for you to keep seeing life as a quest and as a profound journey in which you keep expanding and integrating your experiences. By allowing yourself the freedom and time for reading, traveling, and being out in the world you acquire the experiences that nurture you. Earlier in this life, or in a past life it was important for you to be expansive, to try many things and seek to understand how others thought and acted---but now your Soul yearns to look beyond the relativity of everything to find some essential Truth(s) of your own to live by.

This new philosophic grounding, or rudder, allows you to see life as a grand adventure, and to feel a certain safety in your position. Your psyche, like a sailboat, won't tip so easily when your Soul has framed your experiences in a way that allows for mistakes, changes, and even betrayals, because there is a growing understanding of how human and divine nature interact. You now have the wisdom to see life as a grand adventure, and it's important to take the time to share with others what you've discovered about the meaning of life. You need to find new ways to tell your story.

There's a bit of the gypsy, scholar and philosopher in you. And as you develop your intuitive nature more and speak from your higher mind, your friends will delight in your storytelling ability and deep wisdom. You're in the process of leaving behind the impatient, overly logical part of yourself that thinks it constantly needs more information. When you spend time by yourself in nature, or pondering a good book, you begin acquiring a new self-confidence and a soul-full resonance that echoes in your speaking.

As you move along this path, you new found sense of security in this life allows you to keep a good attitude and an optimism that attracts others. You are also good at distributing "good and fair ideas" and you would do well as a teacher or speaker in whatever field you have competence in.

As you pick up the gold in the shadow of Gemini, you treasure the wealth and variety of different experiences you've had in the past---you've lived more in one life that some people have in many. And now you're able to pull it all together into a coherent life. The new Sagittarian vision is one that adds meaningfulness to the full palate of your Gemini experiences.

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Neith’s Feedback on the North Node in Sagittarius

Since this the Nodal axis that is the flipped version of mine, I am going to add a little on my experience of synastry when the North Node in one person’s chart conjuncts the South Node in another’s. In theory, this sounds like a nice complement of energies. After all, the primary aspect is the conjunction and usually conjunctions indicate a certain level of understanding in synastry.

A very good woman friend’s SO has his Moon/South Node in Gemini exactly conjunct my North Node in Gemini. We like each other and get along fine most of the time (I have known this fellow for 20+ yrs). It was when I started working for him about 5 years ago and interacted with him 4-5 days a week that I became aware of the subtle effect of the having the opposite Nodes. In this case, he could see so many different perspectives and details, he frequently became paralyzed attempting to sort them out. If he remembered to stay focused on the big picture and let me handle the details, we did fine . . .

The bottom line here is the difference between the ideal and the reality of having the opposite Nodes in synastry. This occurs when people are roughly 10 yrs apart in age (or 10~ increments). The effect gradually becomes more difficult to handle over time and proximity and I liken it to hearing a tone become more off-key . . . very, very irritating. So if you meet someone with the opposite Nodes and are considering spending lots of time together, be aware of this. Consulting your astrologer to review the overall picture of your synastry is a good idea!

Brutality Beyond Belief

This is not the kind of thing I ordinarily do. But to stay silent and not do anything is impossible. On Sunday night, "60 Minutes" aired a piece about the epidemic of rape and torture in the Congo that has reached epic proportions--the sexual violence in the Congo right now is the worst in the world. It is called a War against Women, but it's also directed at young girls, and it makes what I can imagine life in a concentration camp look like a vacation compared to the type of rape and dis-memberment that is happening right now in Africa.

The good news is that a group at: www.womenforwomen.org are helping the victims and greating a support system to help a woman go from victim to survivor. They have a sponsorship program that enables us to help one particular woman for a year for $27 a month. You can choose to write to her or not. But basically you are saving a life......this charity has received the highest possible rating for a non-profit, in that the proceeds go directly to the women. I beg you to consider.........

North Node Cancer

North Node Cancer, South Node Capricorn

When you work a long day don't you yearn to come home and rest? Somewhere in your past, either earlier in this life or in a previous one, you've worked really hard pursuing your goals, and self-sacrificing, often for the sake of others. Now it's time to shift focus, take the emphasis off the goal and onto the process of life unfolding---how do you feel about what's happening? That's the question to consider.

It's time to think about nurturing yourself, your family, and your friends. There's a desire to feel secure and at home with those you love. Find new ways to nurture and allow yourself to be nurtured as well.

In the past you may have had to shut yourself down emotionally to get your job done, or perhaps to get the children fed and put to bed. Now you realize that you've missed something in the focusing on the goal rather than the process and that some of the sweetness and joy of life won't happen while you're focused on results. Now you're meant to make home, heart and hearth a priority and to open up to whatever gives you a sense of rootedness and connection. Cancer North Nodes are nurtured by being by the water, by delving into their family history, and by honoring the good part of traditions. The family karmic inheritance is usually strong, and it would be good for you to sift through the positive and negative inheritance you've received and to see what part of it you may be unaware of.

Cancer, being ruled by the moon, fluctuates in its moods and has a wild and loony side as well. No other sign can be so content cleaning out its closets one moment and dancing on the beach by the light of the moon later the same day. Honor your intuitive nature because it is the rich fertile soil of your Soul. Take time to slow down and feel whatever comes up for you, and be as crabby or unpredictable as your sign of the crab. Cancers, like the crab, also outgrow their shells and need to bravely release their fears and defenses to bring new dreams into reality. Monitor your urges to control or help others.

As you turn on your path and retrieve the gold in the shadow of your South Node of Capricorn, you use your commonsense and savvy by being an effective person in the life. You have integrity and ambition. And because you intuitively know how to be successful in the world, having done that in former lives, you now have the freedom and challenge to soften into a personal response to life. You can draw on both your masculine assertiveness with your feminine receptivity. Maintaining the balance of these two energies is key for you.
~elizabeth spring

To understand more details of this, and to see what house this Node falls in; consult your personal chart, or email: http://www.elizabethspring.com/

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Neith's Input on the North Node in Cancer . . .

While I personally am not dealing with the issues of the Cancer/Capricorn axis, I’m seeing these brought to the forefront in the charts of friends and clients who do. With the current shift to Earth signs, Capricorn in particular, by Jupiter and soon Pluto, those people are already feeling the need to re-evaluate what their priorities are. Capricorn is very good at priorities . . . =grin=

What I’m hearing is those with North Node in Cancer awakening to a strong need to nurture themselves and after many years of placing the needs of others first, not being sure of how to do this. Because of Cancer’s yielding and fluid way of expressing themselves it’s easy to overlook the fact this is a Cardinal sign and quite capable of initiating change. Elizabeth has given a nice set of directions here for you North Node in Cancer folks to follow. Use your native South Node in Capricorn gift for setting up your list of priorities and take that first step! Keep in mind too self-nurturing is very important to being able to nurture others.

Bitterness; the Silent Disease

Bitterness; the Silent Disease

“Anger is a short madness.”
Horace 65 BC

Anger is a short madness, but bitterness is anger that has been boiled, simmered, and then found so unpalatable that it has been thrown into the deep freeze of our unconscious psyches. We may think that we have done our ‘anger management’ by cooling and repressing our anger, but in most cases, it’s still alive and not well. It needs to be thawed, re-heated, and disposed of properly. Refrigeration doesn’t work well, as cooled anger turns to resentment and bitterness. It has an annoying tendency to leak out at inappropriate times-- upsetting good relationships, disturbing our dreams, and filling us with a vague discontent.

Anger is what we feel first in the face of injustice, and repeated anger becomes deep-seated resentment at whoever and whatever is upsetting us. It turns cold and bitter. And the worse part is that it can turn us bitter even when we think we’ve hidden it so well! It can show on our faces, in our expressions, in our tone of voice. It gives us indigestion, insomnia, back pain, and unexplained headaches. We want so much for it not to de-freeze-- we want so much to forgive and forget, but proper disposal of toxic pain isn’t easy. Most of us need help with it.
Bitterness is a crusty disease that grows on unprocessed anger. It is particularly dangerous for us as we age, because many therapists, including myself, believe that it plays a part in heart disease as well. The heart is both a physical and emotional organ that reflects how we treat it. Most of us are trying to exercise away the excesses that have deposited themselves as fat—but what are we doing with all that un-dealt with pain in our hearts? With the years of frozen anger?

First of all, it needs to be acknowledged. Yes, it’s there. Maybe you call it disillusionment with your career, or maybe you say it’s how your sister cheated you out of part of your inheritance, or maybe it’s that romantic love never quite came through for you. You may have the regret of the ‘enabler’ or the one who had to sacrifice a large part of her life for another. Maybe you blame someone or blame yourself. What matters most though, is the story we tell ourselves about it.

This story needs to be re-told and re-framed. If you will investigate, research, and delve deeper into the place where you hold this bitterness and pain, you can gain a wider perspective and a deeper understanding of the whole picture. You need to have someone who can deeply listen to your story, and whose opinions you trust. Allow them to help you understand it from a variety of different perspectives. Allow them to help you put it into a story that makes some sense (not easy!)

The psychologist, Carl Jung, once wrote that all adult neuroses could only be healed by a spiritual perspective. Perhaps you can find a way to infuse the story with love towards yourself and others. The last step will be to tell the ‘deep freezer of your subconscious’ the new story of how and why it all happened, and how you see it now.

As a psychotherapist and astrological counselor, I often look at what I call the family karmic inheritance. This is the legacy of inherited sins and blessings that get handed down the generations, and I believe it’s responsible for more psychic distress than we realize.

You may notice that you have our mother’s eyes, but have you noticed that you have some of her passive aggressive traits as well? Do you know what she was holding her anger about? Can you discover how far back it goes? Could you be overly sensitive to authoritarian figures like your grandfather, or experiencing a similar conflict between the demands of creativity and family that he once did? How bad did it get? Once you know the nature of the inheritance you can look at it how it’s showing up in your life. Old, long, and difficult inheritances can be particularly insidious. When you become conscious of the “sins of the father’s” you not only begin a healing process for yourself, but you stop the inheritance from infecting your children.
Generations of maternal and paternal legacies influence us in subtle and no so subtle ways. In some families (such as the presidential Kennedy’s) there has been mention of a family ‘curse’. Although that is an exaggeration for most of us, almost everyone inherits a mixture of psycho-spiritual legacies that need to be sorted through. We need to pull out all the stories we can from the family deep freezer.

You can’t be fueled by bitterness, but you can be fueled by anger. Bitterness eats you up, whereas anger can fuel you to do the emotional detective work that heals. It can help you find your voice and your courage. If you are feeling depressed, stuck, or cynical its time to do the psychic de-freezing. This is the time to act, not to “depress.” You may have to admit that your attempts to sublimate and distract yourself from your difficult moods aren’t working any more. This is a good thing, because it means the time is right for you to make a positive and perhaps radical change.

As an astrologer and counselor, I find that there is a grace and energy that shows up when we do things at the right time. If you have no family members who are alive, or who won’t tell you true stories; you can find powerful hints as to this inheritance on your astrological chart. And when you allow yourself to feel strongly about your feelings, rather than freezing them, you allow an opening for grace and serendipity. Call it what you will: God or chance or synchronicity, but whenever you decide to melt the frozen chunks of bitter memories with the healing warmth of tears and heartfelt stories, you invite in powers and graces beyond your rational mind. I believe we ‘summon the Gods’ with our open hearts, and that the Soul is ruthless in finding its way home. Blessings on your journey home. (c)Elizabeth Spring http://www.elizabethspring.com/