All posts here are from sections of the books: "North Node Astrology; Rediscovering Your Life Direction and Soul Purpose" and "Lifting the Veil; Becoming Your Own Best Astrologer" and "Astrology for the Third Act of Life" and finally "Saturn Returns~The Private Papers of A Reluctant Astrologer" All available in paperback, Kindle and Audible on

To inquire about readings or for more articles on the North/South Nodes, go to:

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Research on Node Reversal in Synastry

This is a guest post by Neith
Whenever I wish to do some astrological research I have my family birth data to draw upon going back a couple of generations. In this instance, I was curious to see what the patterns were within the family for Reversed Moon’s Nodes for couples and their children. My personal experience of relating to another person who has the opposite Nodes suggests proximity is an important factor. I have several cyber-friends with North Node in Sagittarius very close to my South Node in Sagittarius and there are no problems at all. It seems to take the day-to-day interchanges to up the irritation factor – like working with someone or living with them in a family setting.

What I found after looking up all my extended family’s birth dates was very interesting. Out of all the couples in both my parent’s generation and mine, only ONE had Reversed Nodes! In fact, only a few parent/children had Reversed Nodes and most of the time it was the mother, not the father, involved. These were children that left home at the first opportunity, usually going off to school halfway across the country.

It is my aunt and uncle who live closest to us who have the Reversed Nodes. They will have been married for 55 years this year and it has been a stressful relationship most of that time. My uncle is 10 yrs older than my aunt (my mother’s youngest sister) and they have 5 children, the oldest of whom is 9 years younger than I. I don’t have birth times for either person so I will just review the astrology using the shorthand method.

My aunt is an Aquarius Sun, Capricorn Moon and my uncle has a Taurus Sun and very likely an Aquarius Moon. If this is the case, the Luminaries form a trine and conjunction by sign – very compatible! Their Moons would be semi-sextile (Capricorn to Aquarius) and that does seem to fit. My aunt is extremely well organized and always had neatly written lists of chores for her kids posted about. =grin=

Their Mercury’s are trine too. Her Mercury is in Capricorn and his in Taurus and they are both practical sorts and can take care of business when they need to.

His Mars is in Libra trine her Venus in Aquarius and her Mars in Capricorn is trine his Venus in Taurus. However, with their Mars square by sign, they have a difficult time agreeing on how to work together. And their Venuses are square giving them very different ideas of enjoyment. Once their children were grown they quite attempting to vacation together at all and my uncle would go hunting with my dad (they have been friends since childhood) and my aunt would fly off to Europe by herself.

Saturn plays a role here too with Saturn/Venus intra-aspects, always a good indicator of durability. Plus his Mercury/Venus conjunction in Taurus are exactly conjunct her Chiron/North Node in Taurus. He has his Sun conjunct his South Node in Taurus and is quite comfortable living in home he was born in and grew up in . . .

I believe it is the combination of very compatible elements, the Saturn/Venus intra-aspect and the tidy synastry stellium in Taurus, noted for staying with the known quantity, which has contributed to them staying together. They are both Fixed sign types too and the Nodal axis here is Taurus/Scorpio, noted for tenacity. But I know first hand how bitter things are and how unhappy they have been for much of their married life. Based on my own experiences and this example, I have to say if I saw Reversed Nodes in a couple’s synastry, I would caution them to really consider carefully what type of relationship they wish to have.

A snip of this post appears on Neith on Synastry.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Leo Full Moon Joy


The moon is full tonight
an illustration for sheet music,
an image in Matthew Arnold
glimmering on the English Channel,
or a ghost over a smoldering battlefield
in one of the history plays.

It's as full as it was
in that poem by Coleridge where
he carries his year-old son into the orchard
behind the cottage and turns the baby's face
to the sky to see for the first time
the earth's bright companion,
something amazing to make his crying seem small.

And if you wanted to follow this example,
tonight would be the night
to carry some tiny creature outside
and introduce him to the moon.
And if your house has no child,
you can always gather into your arms
the sleeping infant of yourself,
as I have done tonight,
and carry him outdoors,
all limp in his tattered blanket,
making sure to steady his lolling
headwith the palm of your hand.
And while the wind ruffles the pear trees
in the corner of the orchard and dark roses
wave against a stone wall, you can turn him
on your shoulder and walk in circles on the lawn
drunk with the light.
You can lift him up into the sky,
your eyes nearly as wide as his,
as the moon climbs high into the night.

~ Billy Collins ~

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Libra North Node; Aries South Node

North Node Libra
Libra North Node, South Node Aries

Achieving “serenity” is a soul aspiration for you in this lifetime, although the thrill of the hero’s journey and the grand quest is strong for you with these Nodes. Your South Node is ruled by the mythical hero, Mars, who embodies the ideal of the spiritual warrior and the one who breaks new ground. However, with your North Node in Libra, ruled by Venus, it is through the more feminine side of yourself that you come home to yourself. Venus compensates for the excesses of Mars, and yet she can be a demanding muse or irritation, depending on how you treat the masculine/feminine polarity within yourself.

With this Nodal axis it will be important for you to find ways to calm down, release tension, and allow all forms of beauty and harmony to heal you. Like a finely turned violin, you need to catch stress and pressure before it causes something to snap. There may have been something exhausting earlier in this life or in a previous life experience where you placed great emphasis on personal achievement, self-sacrifice and courageous action. Now it’s time to release the singular survival urge and ambitious mentality to develop your North Node’s Soul's yearning for deep serenity. For you, this suggests nurturing co-operative relationships and finding release from the mental/emotional “tension of the opposites.”

The symbol of your Venus ruled Libra North Node is the ancient image of Athena holding the Scales. This mental weighing and balancing of the ‘great opposites” in life is exhausting, yet the challenge of knowing what is “right and fair and true” is too delicious not to embrace. You delight in having had the courage (South Node Aries) to go where others have not, to endure, and to bring home the “golden fleece”. Yet it is ultimately about the learning of “right relationship” that is one of the main tasks for you in this life. It will require a relaxing of some old ways of thinking and being, as you create win/win situations with others and relax the urge to engage in victim-rescuer scenarios.

As your understanding of human nature grows, you acquire a tolerance for paradox and ambiguity and for the many different ways people perceive reality. As this increasing acceptance of the complexities of life and people grow you may find yourself in positions of peace-keeping or as a counselor or mediator.
You can excel in the Venusian fields of art, entertainment, and beauty, if you choose to develop this side of your nature. Home, heart, and hearth can take on increasing importance—one could say that these Venus ruled areas are good compensatory medicine for you. As you grow into a more balanced focus on inter-dependence rather than too much dependence or independence, you'll finally find a way to assert yourself with more confidence and without creating conflict. Your compassionate objectivity can bring a deep contentment into your life and into the lives of anyone you touch.

Earlier in this life, or in a previous life, chances are that you were engaged in “a serious battle” of some sort. It could have been a war, or it may be a vague emotional memory of trauma. However, those left-over default patterns, or shadow qualities of Mars—the feeling of needing to know, to be right, and in your place of power, only increase the dramatic, intense and overly emotional backdrop of your past life that your Soul longs to move away from. Your unconscious knows the horror of trauma and drama, yet you also know how to numb the effects of battle, and how to create the soothing rush of the adrenaline high with a new beginning. You can dare to slow down. The war is over; you’ve won.

As you move to redeem the “gold in the shadow of Aries” in mid-life you may need to become less self-centered to find the serenity and co-operation with others you desire—and how many and varied the ways you may consciously and unconsciously do this! No matter how accommodating you may see yourself, you may occasionally need to dip back into this gold in the shadow, and tap into that Martian/ Aries assertiveness again. Yes, Libra is about balance, justice and beauty, but without a good dose of the Martian courageousness and sense of adventure, Libra can be ineffective and indecisive. As you continue to learn to tolerate the complexities and paradoxes in life (an on-going Libran task!) you discover a new sense of equanimity, and you may notice that life comes to you, rather than you having to go to it. Allow yourself time to not rush into making decisions--you need to weigh and balance all the different ways you perceive and think about things.

In the latter part of your life you’re more likely to seek the comfort of love rather than the drama of love earned through effort and ambition. Where there is no war, there is also greater beauty.

Soul Purpose: To cultivate a willingness to see all sides of a question and be able to forgive. Release the addiction to passion, ambition, and anger as personal fuel, and replace it with the Venusian nurturing qualities inherent in all things beautiful—music, nature, and art are all healing for you.

Shadow: Having to be right and to righteously defend a cause while causing a lot of inner and outer disturbance. Too much emphasis on the powers of the ego and not enough on the Self, and/or Self in relationship to others.

William Butler Yeats, Irish poet, dramatist, astrologer and occultist, was one of the foremost figures of 20th century literature. Yeats had his North Node in Libra, South Node in Aries, and despite (or because of) his many literary accomplishments, he is often looked at curiously for his unusual love life and his passionate quest for a direct experience of Spirit. His many relationships with women were tumultuous, and the Venusian muse was particularly hard on him. He was refused in marriage multiple times by Maud Gonne, the love of his life, and again by his proposal of marriage to her daughter.

Yeats was in love with Maud Gonne for 28 years (a full Saturn cycle) and claimed to have a spiritual marriage with her—perhaps providing Yeats with the emotional suffering necessary for an alchemical breakdown to take place. It seems significant that Yeats’ life long desire to channel spirit information came to him, not by the excesses of his passion, but through his later life marriage to his wife, Georgie. One cannot know if he found the “serenity” that is the hallmark for Libra, but one could hope that in accepting the responsibility of their marriage and two children, Yeats may have turned the base metal of everyday human life into the gold he so yearned for in his spiritual quest.

As a member of the occult society of the Golden Dawn it became necessary for Yeats to grasp the unity of opposition over and over again, and the necessity of alchemical healing through suffering and purification. His magical name in that society: Demon Est Deus Inversus (the Devil is God inverted) underlines that opposition.

Yeats knew that in Vedic Indian astrology, his “head of the dragon, Rahu,” was in Libra, and the “tail of the dragon, Ketu,” was in Aries. C.G. Jung wrote in his book, Mysterium Coniunctionis.“ the image of the uroboros (the serpent or dragon swallowing its own tail) lies the thought of devouring oneself and turning oneself into a circulatory process. The uroboros is a dramatic symbol for the integration and assimilation of the opposite, i.e., of the shadow...”

It is interesting to note that the South Node shadow for Yeats was in Aries, with it’s polar opposite, in compensatory Venus ruled Libra, while the opposite is true for two other men who pioneered in the area of the unconscious—Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung. They both had the opposite polarity of North Node being in Mars ruled Aries, and South Node in Libra. All three men shared the passionate Venus/Mars polarity with its intense interest/disinterest in sexuality, love, and the life of the spirit.
~Elizabeth Spring Artwork by Kerstin Zettmar at
As you see, all North Node descriptions are similar to sun sign descriptions, without the South Node opposition. Any North Node Libras out there with more to add? As a Sun sign Libra I find I'm only indecisive on the big issues of life, and the little decisions are quickly done.....

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Sagittarius North Node, Gemini South Node

Sagittarius North Node

Sagittarius North Node, Gemini South Node

Having come into this life with the talent for seeing so many different points of view, it's important now for you to continually hone in on your own "Truth" and find the philosophic rudder for your life. It's good for you to keep seeing life as a quest and as a profound journey in which you keep expanding and integrating your experiences. By allowing yourself freedom and time for reading, traveling, and being out in the world you acquire the experiences that nurture you.

Earlier in this life, or in a past life it was important for you to be quick, fast talking, and to know all the answers if you could. You were willing to try many things and sought to understand how others thought and acted---but now your Soul yearns to look beyond the relativity of everything to find some essential Truth of your own to live by.

This new philosophic grounding, or rudder, allows you to see life as a grand adventure, and to feel a certain safety in your position. Your psyche, like a sailboat, won't tip so easily when your Soul has framed your experiences in a way that allows for mistakes, changes, and even betrayals, because there is a growing understanding of how human and divine nature interact. You now have the wisdom to see life as a grand adventure, and it's important to take the time to share with others what you've discovered about the meaning of life. You need to find new ways to tell your story.

There's a bit of the gypsy, scholar and philosopher in you. And as you develop your intuitive nature more and speak from your higher mind, your friends will delight in your storytelling ability and deep wisdom. You're in the process of leaving behind the impatient, overly logical part of yourself that constantly hungers for more factual information. When you spend time by yourself in nature, or pondering a reflective book, or simply open yourself up to true inspiration, you begin acquiring a deeper purpose in life and a soul-full resonance that echoes in the way you present yourself to the world.

As you move along this path, you new found sense of security in this life allows you to keep a good attitude and an optimism that attracts others. You are also good at distributing "good and fair ideas" and you would do well as a teacher or speaker in whatever field you have competence in.

As you pick up the gold in the shadow of Gemini, you treasure the wealth and variety of different experiences you've had in the past---you've lived more in one life that some people have in many. And now you're able to pull it all together into a coherent life. The new Sagittarian vision is one that adds meaningfulness to the full palate of your Gemini experiences.

Soul Purpose: Expanded consciousness and a wide breath of experience, through study, travel or contact with other cultures, that encourages a philosophy of life that you live by, and perhaps teach. You need to give yourself time to think about the big picture of your life, to ponder what all your efforts will amount to, and then avoid the distractions that keep you from achieving your highest ideals.

Shadow: Over-extension, over-doing, and “tripping the life fantastic.” Are you all about too many tactics and clever action, but have no long range strategy or goal for your life? Are you constantly avoiding commitments in order to keep your options open? Release any addiction to the desire “to stay forever young.” With your keen intellect and sense of wonder and curiosity, you may have a talent with language and communication—be sure to use it soulfully and not glibly.

Bill Gates has this nodal polarity. As American business magnate, philanthropist, and the world’s third richest person (as of February 8, 2008), he is chairman of Microsoft, the software company he co-founded. Gates is one of the best-known entrepreneurs of the personal computer revolution. Although he is admired by many people, others criticize his business tactics, which they consider anti-competitive, an opinion which has in some cases been upheld by the courts. In the later stages of his career, Gates has pursued a number of philanthropic endeavors, donating large amounts of money to various charitable organizations and scientific research programs through the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, established in 2000.

Before getting married, Bill’s focus was strictly business oriented. From Microsoft's founding in 1975 until 2006, Gates aggressively broadened the company's range of products, and wherever Microsoft achieved a dominant position he vigorously defended it. First hand accounts of Gates in business meetings describe him as verbally combative, berating managers for perceived holes in their business strategies--he often interrupted presentations with such comments as, "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard!"and, "Why don't you just give up your options and join the Peace Corps?"

Bill was born with Gemini street smarts, and has been known to even brag about his IQ. However street smart savvy he is, one wonders if he would have ever moved towards his philosophic Sagittarian North Node without the influence of his wife. Sagittarius is ruled by Jupiter which rules both humanitarian and philosophic endeavors, as well as all things expansive and abundant One could make a case that Gates didn’t find the philosophic rudder of his ship till he married his wife, Melinda. Gates on January 1, 1994 and began a new career as the father of three children.

Bill Gates stepped down as chief executive officer of Microsoft in January, 2000. In June, 2006, Gates announced that he would be transitioning from full-time work at Microsoft to full-time work in his philanthropy foundation. One wonder perhaps if in some way he is the one who is now joining the Peace Corps? Bill and Melinda’s foundation has given away over 14 billion dollars so far, and its estimated that Bill and Melinda will give away close to 100 billion in their lifetime. Melinda has also recently unveiled a plan to eradicate malaria, which the couple will help finance.

I suspect it was Bill’s acceptance of Melinda in his life that made all the difference in his life’s trajectory. It’s much more comfortable for people with lots of Gemini and Sagittarius in their chart or on the Nodes, to rally around the cry “don’t fence me in!” Partnership commitment, intimacy and receptivity to others on a deep level doesn’t come easy for them. According to Wikipedia, friends of the couple say that Bill wouldn't be shifting gears if it weren't for Melinda. Moreover, they say, she has helped Bill become more open, patient, and compassionate. "Bullshit!" he bellows. Nicer, perhaps? "No way!" he shouts, grinning because he knows it's true. About the philanthropic work he says, "I don't think it would be fun to do on my own, and I don't think I'd do as much of it." The couple's close friend, financial wizard, Warren Buffett, who has known them since 1991 says: "Bill really needs her."

However, it was Bill's choice to bring her into his life—it was his Soul’s choice. Buffett also has stated that Melinda makes Bill a better decision-maker. (Doesn’t that Gemini South Node see almost too many possibilities? Indecision catches the Gemini South Node as a default pattern as a first response—but then once committed, Sagittarius will defend any personal cause to the bitter end….and he certainly defended Microsoft.) "He's smart as hell," Buffett went on to say. "But in terms of seeing the whole picture, she's smarter." Would Buffett have given the Gates Foundation his fortune if Melinda were not in the picture? "That's a great question," he replies. "And the answer is, I'm not sure."


Neith’s Feedback on the North Node in Sagittarius

Since this the Nodal axis that is the flipped version of mine, I am going to add a little on my experience of synastry when the North Node in one person’s chart conjuncts the South Node in another’s. In theory, this sounds like a nice complement of energies. After all, the primary aspect is the conjunction and usually conjunctions indicate a certain level of understanding in synastry.

A very good woman friend’s SO has his Moon/South Node in Gemini exactly conjunct my North Node in Gemini. We like each other and get along fine most of the time (I have known this fellow for 20+ yrs). It was when I started working for him about 5 years ago and interacted with him 4-5 days a week that I became aware of the subtle effect of the having the opposite Nodes. In this case, he could see so many different perspectives and details, he frequently became paralyzed attempting to sort them out. If he remembered to stay focused on the big picture and let me handle the details, we did fine . . .

The bottom line here is the difference between the ideal and the reality of having the opposite Nodes in synastry. This occurs when people are roughly 10 yrs apart in age (or 10~ increments). The effect gradually becomes more difficult to handle over time and proximity and I liken it to hearing a tone become more off-key . . . very, very irritating. So if you meet someone with the opposite Nodes and are considering spending lots of time together, be aware of this. Consulting your astrologer to review the overall picture of your synastry is a good idea!

Brutality Beyond Belief

This is not the kind of thing I ordinarily do. But to stay silent and not do anything is impossible. On Sunday night, "60 Minutes" aired a piece about the epidemic of rape and torture in the Congo that has reached epic proportions--the sexual violence in the Congo right now is the worst in the world. It is called a War against Women, but it's also directed at young girls, and it makes what I can imagine life in a concentration camp look like a vacation compared to the type of rape and dis-memberment that is happening right now in Africa.

The good news is that a group at: are helping the victims and greating a support system to help a woman go from victim to survivor. They have a sponsorship program that enables us to help one particular woman for a year for $27 a month. You can choose to write to her or not. But basically you are saving a life......this charity has received the highest possible rating for a non-profit, in that the proceeds go directly to the women. I beg you to consider.........

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

North Node Cancer

North Node Cancer, South Node Capricorn

When you work a long day, its good to come home and rest, and when you feel the need for help, its good to feel comfortable enough to ask for it. But for you, there can be a resistance to these very natural things. Somewhere in your past, either earlier in this life or in a previous one, you've worked hard pursuing your goals and doing what needed to be done. You’ve come into this life with an attitude that knows how to survive by being practical and by adapting to the harsh realities of life and making a living. (Some of you have even allowed an almost pathological sense of caution or reserve to develop in response to having to keep a stiff upper lip.) Now it’s time to soften, relax, and heal from being in a competitive and sometimes pressured environment.

Now it's time to shift focus from “them to you”, and to take the emphasis off the goal and onto the process of life unfolding. How do you feel about what's happening? That's the question to consider. Part of your soul purpose is to heal from the limitations of your past, so there’s a necessity at times, to cry a few tears…to simply feel. It’s not giving into self—pity though, and you won’t linger long in that place, for the balanced attitude of your Capricorn/Cancer axis is one that innately knows how to hold the tension of the opposites.

After your first Saturn return around the age of 29 the emphasis will turn even more towards nurturing yourself, your family, and your friends. Home, heart, and hearth become a priority. There's a desire to feel secure and at home with those you love. You may want to feel a kind of “heart security” you may never have experienced before. In the past you may have had times when you’ve had to shut yourself down emotionally, and now you realize you've missed something in the focusing on the goal rather than the process. Some of the sweetness and joy of life won't happen if you're focused on goals and ambition rather than taking the time to tend to your inner life.

Cancer North Nodes are nurtured by being by the ocean (or any bodies of water) by delving into their family history, and by honoring the good part of traditions. The family karmic inheritance is usually strong, and it would be good for you to sift through the positive and negative inheritance you've received and to see what part of it you may be unaware of. Cancer, being ruled by the moon, fluctuates in its moods and has a wild and loony side as well. No other sign can be so content cleaning out its closets one moment and dancing on the beach by the light of the moon later the same day. With your North Node here you’ll want to honor this intuitive and lunar side of yourself because it’s the fertile soil of your Soul. Take time to slow down and feel whatever comes up for you, and when you feel you’ve outgrown your current life, dare to let go of the past and open a new chapter of your life. Cancers, like the crab, periodically outgrow their shells and need to bravely release their fears and defenses to bring new dreams into reality. The pull of continued growth and evolution through regeneration and resurrection is strong in this Cancer/Capricorn axis.

Soul Purpose: In this life it’s important for you to heal from duty and necessity—you may need to cry a few tears to unblock your emotions and express your true feelings. You may also want to make it a priority to give and receive love, and to watch what happens when you tend to the process of life rather than the goal. Dare to risk new beginnings that lead to metaphorical death, re-birth and resurrection, taking calculated risks. Use your sense of humor to repair, entertain, and mend bridges between family and friends.

Shadow: Honoring of the demands of “sheer practicality” can be an excuse to not be in touch with your feelings of sorrow or joy. By not allowing the feminine and “lunar or looney” side of your personality out, it can make you appear to be a bit of a glum “Eeyore” at times. Another defense mechanism you might be tempted to use could simply be an appearance of pride—the kind of “hubris than cometh before a fall.”


English blues rock guitarist, singer/songwriter Eric Clapton has these Cancer/Capricorn Nodes. Often viewed today by critics as the greatest guitarist of all time, his music—and life—has always been grounded in the blues. When Eric was 9 years old he discovered that he and his brother had been deserted by his real parents, and that they’d been raised by his grandparents. When his brother died unexpectedly, Clapton became, in his own words, “a lonely and nasty kid.” (Maybe just an Eeyore?) He tried playing the guitar but found it so difficult to learn that he almost gave up, but the connection to his emotions through the “blues” pulled him through and kept him at it. So instead of shutting down his feelings or being out of touch with them, as South Node Capricorns can do at times, he reached for them—through ‘the blues.” One of his more famous songs in his later life was called: “Tears in Heaven,” that came out of the unexpected tragic death of his son.

Before this, at one point in mid-life, Clapton let his emotions slip into serious drug abuse, but with help he was able to get clean and later opened a drug rehabilitation clinic which he still financially supports. Clapton has mixed the professional Saturnian hard working nature of Capricorn with his fluctuating emotional life to make a powerful impact in the world of music. He uses his music to connect deeply with the promptings of his heart, and in healing himself, he heals all of us.
(c) elizabeth spring

Friday, January 4, 2008

Bitterness; the Silent Disease

Bitterness; the Silent Disease

“Anger is a short madness.”
Horace 65 BC

Anger is a short madness, but bitterness is anger that has been boiled, simmered, and then found so unpalatable that it has been thrown into the deep freeze of our unconscious psyches. We may think that we have done our ‘anger management’ by cooling and repressing our anger, but in most cases, it’s still alive and not well. It needs to be thawed, re-heated, and disposed of properly. Refrigeration doesn’t work well, as cooled anger turns to resentment and bitterness. It has an annoying tendency to leak out at inappropriate times-- upsetting good relationships, disturbing our dreams, and filling us with a vague discontent.

Anger is what we feel first in the face of injustice, and repeated anger becomes deep-seated resentment at whoever and whatever is upsetting us. It turns cold and bitter. And the worse part is that it can turn us bitter even when we think we’ve hidden it so well! It can show on our faces, in our expressions, in our tone of voice. It gives us indigestion, insomnia, back pain, and unexplained headaches. We want so much for it not to de-freeze-- we want so much to forgive and forget, but proper disposal of toxic pain isn’t easy. Most of us need help with it.
Bitterness is a crusty disease that grows on unprocessed anger. It is particularly dangerous for us as we age, because many therapists, including myself, believe that it plays a part in heart disease as well. The heart is both a physical and emotional organ that reflects how we treat it. Most of us are trying to exercise away the excesses that have deposited themselves as fat—but what are we doing with all that un-dealt with pain in our hearts? With the years of frozen anger?

First of all, it needs to be acknowledged. Yes, it’s there. Maybe you call it disillusionment with your career, or maybe you say it’s how your sister cheated you out of part of your inheritance, or maybe it’s that romantic love never quite came through for you. You may have the regret of the ‘enabler’ or the one who had to sacrifice a large part of her life for another. Maybe you blame someone or blame yourself. What matters most though, is the story we tell ourselves about it.

This story needs to be re-told and re-framed. If you will investigate, research, and delve deeper into the place where you hold this bitterness and pain, you can gain a wider perspective and a deeper understanding of the whole picture. You need to have someone who can deeply listen to your story, and whose opinions you trust. Allow them to help you understand it from a variety of different perspectives. Allow them to help you put it into a story that makes some sense (not easy!)

The psychologist, Carl Jung, once wrote that all adult neuroses could only be healed by a spiritual perspective. Perhaps you can find a way to infuse the story with love towards yourself and others. The last step will be to tell the ‘deep freezer of your subconscious’ the new story of how and why it all happened, and how you see it now.

As a psychotherapist and astrological counselor, I often look at what I call the family karmic inheritance. This is the legacy of inherited sins and blessings that get handed down the generations, and I believe it’s responsible for more psychic distress than we realize.

You may notice that you have our mother’s eyes, but have you noticed that you have some of her passive aggressive traits as well? Do you know what she was holding her anger about? Can you discover how far back it goes? Could you be overly sensitive to authoritarian figures like your grandfather, or experiencing a similar conflict between the demands of creativity and family that he once did? How bad did it get? Once you know the nature of the inheritance you can look at it how it’s showing up in your life. Old, long, and difficult inheritances can be particularly insidious. When you become conscious of the “sins of the father’s” you not only begin a healing process for yourself, but you stop the inheritance from infecting your children.
Generations of maternal and paternal legacies influence us in subtle and no so subtle ways. In some families (such as the presidential Kennedy’s) there has been mention of a family ‘curse’. Although that is an exaggeration for most of us, almost everyone inherits a mixture of psycho-spiritual legacies that need to be sorted through. We need to pull out all the stories we can from the family deep freezer.

You can’t be fueled by bitterness, but you can be fueled by anger. Bitterness eats you up, whereas anger can fuel you to do the emotional detective work that heals. It can help you find your voice and your courage. If you are feeling depressed, stuck, or cynical its time to do the psychic de-freezing. This is the time to act, not to “depress.” You may have to admit that your attempts to sublimate and distract yourself from your difficult moods aren’t working any more. This is a good thing, because it means the time is right for you to make a positive and perhaps radical change.

As an astrologer and counselor, I find that there is a grace and energy that shows up when we do things at the right time. If you have no family members who are alive, or who won’t tell you true stories; you can find powerful hints as to this inheritance on your astrological chart. And when you allow yourself to feel strongly about your feelings, rather than freezing them, you allow an opening for grace and serendipity. Call it what you will: God or chance or synchronicity, but whenever you decide to melt the frozen chunks of bitter memories with the healing warmth of tears and heartfelt stories, you invite in powers and graces beyond your rational mind. I believe we ‘summon the Gods’ with our open hearts, and that the Soul is ruthless in finding its way home. Blessings on your journey home. (c)Elizabeth Spring